Why Are Your Pants So Tight?

In the realm of fitness, yoga and exercise, it is an absolute MUST to wear loose-fitting clothes as doing so helps our body regulate its temperature and circulation. However, looking around at the latest fashion, one should come to the conclusion that: when not exercising, we MUST. WEAR. REALLY. TIGHT. PANTS.

Tight pants and fashion have been on my mind for the past year, though, in the form of a recurring thought: "why are your pants so tight?" I wanted an answer and found one soon enough. My sister and I recently shared a conversation in which we reasoned to the singular objective of tight pants: to conserve fabric and materials.

That's it? Is that all there is to it?..

I don't think that's all there is to it. No no, you see, the craze around tight pants is embedded in the subtexts of human existence. (Yes, I'm going there.) Tight pants help facilitate the age-old tradition and biological urge to propagate the species.

Trix at What do you mean by sex wrote a post that sheds some light on our attempts to take responsibility by tightening our pants. Here's my response to her post: 
I think you answered the question: Most--no, I'll go out on a limb and say--ALL of perceivable reality is based on assumptions and strings of assumptions. These assumptions must remain in the collective memory of humanity; lest we cause a retrograde occurrence in our reign over the land and the space-time-(human)-resource continuum. Positively, we wish to secure a place in-finity; the goal is to be sapient to the third.

Also: Well there we go. Apparently sexual attraction is all about desiring to insert penises into vaginas and exciting them until ejaculation occurs.

Haha, I though so! This is interesting because I am sexually attracted to this one(1) person, whom my train of thought always carries away and runs into the attraction-penis-vagina-ejaculation ouroburos. It feels counter-intuitive and really interesting to me, how this works despite my asexuality...

This modern approach to fashion works out well for both the clothing industry and those emphatic about "Green" sustainability: Our children will be able to buy the fabric saved from all the tight pants. How environmentally and economically conscious of the fashion industry!

The tighter your pants, the ...

 Am. App. - Halloween